Regret...

Regret…..

The definition of Regret is: to feel sorry and sad about something previously done or said that now appears wrong, mistaken or hurtful to others. A feeling or expression of sorrow and guilt for a past action or event that you now wish had not happened or had happened differently.

I can’t count how many times I’ve heard people say “I have no regrets, just life experiences” or “ I have no regrets.. It has made me who I am”… Really?? When looking back at your life there is NOTHING that you regret? I think people look at the word Regret as something nasty and dirty, admitting you’ve done something wrong, and can’t portray themselves as anything less than perfect… None of us are perfect and we’ve all made mistakes.. and those that can learn from them and better themselves are the wisest.

“People so seldom say I love you and then it's either too late or love goes. So when I tell you I love you, it doesn't mean I know you'll never go, only that I wish you didn't have to.”

SO I decided to take time and list some of my Regrets… Things that I wish I could go back in time and change… And honestly; some of these I still struggle with today, even though I regret it each time.

• Not going to spend more time with my grandmother in her last months, out of fear of having to see my
• Uncle who I could care less to ever see again.
• Not filling out my kids’ baby books in full detail to go back and look over.
• Not taking more pictures of Joey when he was a baby.
• For taking Joey to see his “father”, thinking it would be a pleasant trip; instead my 4 yr old son got to witness his father in a very scary state of mind.
• Not going to college right out of high school when my time wasn’t as sparse as it is now.
• Not enjoying the beaches back home as much as I should have
• Raising my voice at my kids when I’m tired and have no patience
• Losing touch with some very special friends in my life
• Not biting my tongue more often when I’m upset or angry about something…. Loose Lips Sink Ships…
• On the flip side of that; I don’t regret defending myself (or other loved ones) when the time is right.

Stressing over things that don’t really matter in the grand scheme of things… cleaning house, dishes to be done, not always letting my children just be kids and have fun..

“Regret for the things we did can be tempered by time; it is regret for the things we did not do that is inconsolable”


And here are a list of some unpleasant things in my life that have happened, that I don’t regret.. These are the kind of things that have happened that have made me a stronger person.

• For loving the people that have walked out of my life
• For giving all of my trust to those that took advantage of it and taught me who I can and can’t trust
• For loving those that have hurt me
• For having Joey at such an early age; a SR in High School
• For not graduating when I was supposed to and having to go to Night School the following year to graduate
• For giving people 2nd, 3rd chances after being hurt by them
• For not staying in contact with people in my past that live their life in a way that I don’t want my kids to be a part of it.. I love them, and will keep them in my prayers that things get turned around.
• The decisions we made as a couple when we were going through all of our issues a few years ago, although difficult, needed to be done.

For not always giving more chances to those that continue to hurt me. There’s a saying that goes something like Fool me once shame on you, Fool me twice shame on me… I believe in forgiveness but it doesn’t mean I’m a doormat for harsh words, lack of consideration, constant criticism etc. I try not to surround myself around negativity all of the time.

Those are the things that I try not to dwell on to much; we’ve all been in these situations, and often times are stuck focusing on those bad things, that we don’t count our blessings we have before us. We all can find joy in our life, even amongst the worst of sorrow and anguish we might be feeling.
Obviously I could add many things to each of these lists. These are just a few of the things that come to mind while I sit here now.

“When one door closes, another opens; but we often look so long and so regretfully upon the closed door that we do not see the one which has opened for us”