Still adjusting...

Yesterday marked 2 months since my grandmother passed away. I'm still having a difficult time getting used to the idea of not seeing her again, in this lifetime. Some days it seems like a blur, like she's just a phone call, 30 minute drive away. And other days, the pain is just as raw as it was before. Aleena has had her moments of break down as well. We all love her, miss her very much. My mom is still struggling with it as well. I was cleaning out my inbox and found the email I sent out the night she passed away; and I sat here with tears flowing down, remembering the pain I felt that day. I remember sitting in the car with my mom that night telling her how upset I was that I wasn't strong for her, that she was being strong for me, and it was her mother. Well as everyone said, it happened that way for a reason. She was in shock; she really broke down at the funeral, and I had enough composure to comfort her. My mother and I don't have the mother daughter relationship I'd love to have with her, but I pray she knows how much I love her, and value her.

I LOVE this picture; my two toothless babies with Grandma..

Probably my favorite picture of her I have; this was before she got sick and lost her weight, and I LOVE this smile she has. Looks like she's staring right at me....
Aleena and Grandma..